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March 2023
Kamala Harris Puts Finishing Touches On 'Battlestar Galactica' Fan Fiction
Washington, DC — Balancing work and life is a challenge faced by many, but politician Kamala Harris seems to have found the perfect equilibrium. Growing…
December 2022
Tesla Releases Nude-Driving Technology
AUSTIN, TX — Perhaps in an effort to juice the flagging stock price of the electric carmaker, Tesla announced on Thursday that a software update…
World Eager To Completely Forget 'Avatar' Sequel By End Of February
James Cameron’s Avatar: The Way of Water, a sequel to 2009’s Avatar, arrives in theaters on Friday, and movie fans around the world are eagerly looking…
Scientists On Verge Of Making 'Fetch' Happen
On Tuesday morning, the nation’s scientists announced that they had achieved a monumental breakthrough in their nearly two decades-long attempt to make…
Kyrsten Sinema Takes Off Mask To Reveal True Lizard Self
WASHINGTON, DC — Senator Kyrsten Sinema of Arizona shocked the political world on Friday morning when she removed the human mask that she had been…
Kirstie Alley: The Gazette Salutes One Of Scientology's Greats
Biden Touts US-Made Microchips As 'Great With Tiny Sandwiches'
PHOENIX, AZ — During his tour of a semiconductor factory in Arizona’s capital city, President Joe Biden told reporters that US-made microchips are the…
Weird Pain Probably Nothing, Right?
The weird pain that keeps happening, the one that’s like a stinging sometimes, but other times it’s more like a throbbing — it’s probably nothing…
Kanye West Denounced By Home Planet
November 2022
Taylor Swift Demands Ritual Sacrifice Of Top Ticketmaster Executives
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